I remember a conversation with a mediator who told me, quietly and almost apologetically, that they felt unprepared to manage conversations where racism sat just beneath the surface. They were confident with commercial disputes, workplace clashes, and even heavy family breakdowns. But when an intake form hinted at racial tension, or when a participant made […]
When Racism Shows up in the Mediation Room Read More »
I recently came across a blog post from The High Conflict Institute titled Autism Spectrum Disorder and High Conflict Personalities: Working with Cultural Differences. It is presented as practical guidance for conflict professionals working with autistic parties. It is well-intentioned. It is also, in significant ways, harmful, and the harm is not incidental to the
Most mediators are taught how to reframe. Fewer are taught how to explain reframing, and even fewer are encouraged to be transparent about why they do it. Reframing is often described to students as “restating something more neutrally”, “removing toxicity”, or “putting it in a way the other party can hear”. That description is not
Reframing in Mediation: What We Are Really Doing, and Why We Name It Read More »
A colleague recently asked me whether I was familiar with any research on the risks associated with mediating with a heavily pregnant woman. The woman in question was in conflict with her ex-partner, the father of her unborn child, and my colleague wanted to know whether there were particular considerations they should be thinking about.
Should Pregnant Women Be Excluded from Mediation? Questions We Need to Ask Read More »
In my work on neurodiversity and conflict, there are some interesting intersections that come up frequently. There’s one phenomenon I want to make sure you understand, because it comes up constantly in conflict situations. It’s called rejection sensitivity, or sometimes rejection sensitive dysphoria. We all feel rejection Let’s start with what’s universal. We all have
Rejection Sensitivity and Conflict Read More »
If you’re new to mediation, you’ve probably mastered the basics of facilitating dialogue between two parties. But what happens when a third person enters the room? Whether it’s three colleagues in a workplace dispute, a supervisor and two team members, or any other multi-party configuration, these situations require a different approach and careful strategic thinking.
Navigating Multi-Party Mediation Read More »
You trained as a mediator. You’ve learned about impartiality, confidentiality, and party self-determination. Now a colleague or manager asks if you can “facilitate a difficult conversation” between two people in their team. It sounds like mediation. It feels adjacent to mediation. But before you say yes, it’s worth understanding what you’re actually being asked to
When Someone Asks You to “Facilitate a Conversation” Rather Than Mediate Read More »
We are living in a moment where the centre of society feels like it’s cracking. Polarisation is no longer abstract, it’s showing up at dinner tables, in workplaces, and in parliament. Social media rewards outrage, making disputes louder and harder to de-escalate. People feel the legal system is inaccessible: too expensive, too slow, too confusing.
Aspirational Ethics: The Character Required for Conflict Work Today Read More »
Many mediators have been taught, explicitly or implicitly, that part of our ethical role is to “balance power”. At the same time, we are told that we must remain impartial. Both are framed as professional virtues. Rarely do we pause to ask whether they can comfortably coexist. What do we actually mean by “power”?
Can a Mediator Balance Power and Remain Impartial? Read More »
A reflective look at impartiality, consultancy, and the blurry edges between them Many mediators encounter this tension. You are invited into a workplace to support the resolution of a particular conflict between two individuals, and along the way you notice broader structural or cultural problems. You may be qualified and well positioned to help. The
Mediator and Broader Consulting Read More »